9. Coca-Cola never recovers from the cocaine scandal. Result--The judges on American Idol drink RC Cola
8. Star Wars beats Annie Hall for 1978 Best Picture Oscar: the catchphrase "La-Dee-Dah" enters social consciousness over "May the Force Be With You."
7. Alexander III of Macedon loses key battle of Issus: now known as Alexander the Dumb-Ass.
6. Billy Mays survives: Shamwow outmuscles Shticky on cable TV merchandising wars
5. Arkansas pivotal in defeat of Spain in Spanish-American War: now, The Most Interesting Man in the World endorses Pabst Blue Ribbon
3. We evolve nine fingers: the number between 5 and 3 ceases to exist.
2. Egdar Allen Poe never writes his most famous poem: Baltimore's football team now named "The Annabel Lees"
1. Abraham Lincoln survives assassination attempt: Our American Cousin made into 1988 movie starring Kevin Costner.
Be seeing you!